He doesn't believe even in my love for my child, or he despises it (just as he always used to ridicule it).

He despises that feeling in me, but he knows that I won't abandon my child, that I can't abandon my child, that there could be no life for me without my child, even with him whom I love; but that if I abandoned my child and ran away from him, I should be acting like the most infamous, basest of women.

He knows that, and knows that I am incapable of doing that.

" She recalled another sentence in the letter.